Author: Me-n-Jesus

Drifting

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I recently attended a conference, well, actually, not a conference, but a council, the annual council for the Illinois District of Assemblies of God churches. I’ve mentioned in previous blog posts that they have been posted specifically to fulfill requirements for certain classes. I’m not sure I’ve ever mentioned that the reason for those classes is that I’m pursuing credentials to become a pastor within the Assemblies of God.

Those words still rather scare me. It was never, and I mean capital N, NEVER, my plan to be a pastor. My plan was either to pitch for the Cubs (until recently, they couldn’t have done any worse with me than they were doing without me. But this is our year! Go Cubs!!), or join the Army. When the military fell by the wayside, hearing issues preventing me from fulfilling that plan, I decided to get a degree, a Bachelor of Science in Political Science with emphasis in international relations and a minor in Military Science. (Yes, that Army dream died hard. But I got to take the ROTC classes at Northern Illinois University, wore the uniform proudly, and “served” three years in my small capacity.)

And then I drifted. What do you do when all your dreams, from early childhood, crash to the ground and you realize you have NO idea where to go or what to do. I had nothing. Sure, I’ve got a piece of paper that says I finished college. I’m the only one of my generation to do that in my family. And what do I have to show for it? I’ve got a piece of paper.

So I drifted, and I drank, and I drugged, and then drifted some more. I drifted from job to job. I drifted from home to apartment to home again. (Yes, Mom and Dad called my yo-yo.) Just like a boat drifts without an anchor, so I drifted.

And then, I found the anchor, Jesus. My life began to settle down. I got a job. (Been there over 10 years now.) I bought a home. (Six and a half years for that!) And settled into my new life. But those of you who’ve been boating know, if the current is strong, or if it’s windy and you’ve been drifting quickly, sometimes it takes a while for the anchor to grab the bottom. It may b down, but sometimes that anchor just drags across the bottom. Your momentum may slow, but you are still drifting. And that is how I fely, anchor out, tied to Jesus, but the current of the world still dragging me along.

And over the course of this last year, still drifting slowly in the current, dragging the anchor of Jesus through the muck and mire of the bottom of the lake I’ve been on, I didn’t even notice that I was also starting to let the rope pull through my hands. I was losing my grip. As John Bevere, one of the keynote speakers at the council made reference to, I’d been so involved in my own thing, drifting, loosening my grip on the anchor, that when I looked up, I no longer recognized my surroundings. I drifted farther than I ever realized. And it seemed to happen on the blink of an eye. In reality, it’s built up over time. But I allowed myself to become so distracted, it seemed as if just a moment went by.

I’m getting myself back on track, I’ve tightened my grip on the anchor rope again, and I’m beginning to pull in some of that rope that slipped through my hands. And even more important than that, through the speakers at this council, and more so than that, by my focus getting locked back on Jesus, laser sharp and ready to go, the anchor is set. Actually, it’s always been set. The anchor is ALWAYS the anchor. It never changes. What we do with, or to it, is what causes us to drift. But the anchor of Jesus will never be moved.

So I’m back to my study schedule, and I’ll finish up my classes, and I’ll become a pastor. That still sounds so strange to my ears. But if I look at my classes as training, homework and Bible Study as PT (physical training), if I shift my thinking, I’m actually, finally fulfilling my dream of being in the Army.

I have decided to follow Jesus, and I’m a soldier in His Army. No turning back. NO TURNING BACK!

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I wrote this about two weeks ago, not publishing it right away, but just letting it stew for a little while. I love how God uses that stewing process to bring other things to light. As I was reading yesterday, for one of my classes, I encountered this from the author:

“The writer of Hebrews said, “We must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it” (2:1). Drifting takes no conscious effort or strategy. The currents and winds of social trends and fads, in the church as well as in the world, are always in motion.” (Hurst, Randy; The Local Church in Evangelism, 3rd ed.; pg 155)

Isn’t it just amazing how God can pull things together from seemingly unrelated places, yet they suddenly appear as a beautiful piece of art, and you think, “Well, of course this all goes together.” So, this, along with the posts in the coming weeks, and continuing on, will be my project for this class. (Thanks Papa!)

Another Year?

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I can’t believe it’s been a whole year. AGAIN.  One of these years I’m going to get it together and actually post on a regular basis. Well… I guess I actually AM posting on a regular basis. Once a year is regular, isn’t it?

This year has been a difficult one as I’ve been battling what I now know is adrenal fatigue and leaky gut. I’m on the mend now, but it was really rough going for a while. After completing the Chicago Marathon in 2013, I spent about most of this last year sitting on the couch, unable to even walk around the block. Now that I know what it is, I’m working on the cure. Even though I can only do it about once or twice a week, I’m back up to about half a mile per walk. Slow but sure.

And now that I’m getting better, I have a new writing plan in place. I hope to have something a bit more regular within the next couple of months. I’m banking some stuff now, so if I have a set back, I will have some work to put out to be more regular.

So, here;s hoping to communicate with you all again before 2017!!

What If…?

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What’d y’all think of my story? If you have no idea what I’m talking about, check out my previous post Catch the Chariot. So – not bad for a second effort, right? I enjoyed writing it, so I hope you enjoyed reading it. Be looking for more in the months ahead.

As I looked at the story, though, I thought about how typical it is of missional journeys, having to run to catch up with a lost world moving too fast into oblivion. Philip was able to get there, catch up, make the connection, but he had to expend a LOT of energy to do so. Yes, we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. Yes, he probably had supernatural help getting there, just as he did when it was time to leave the Ethiopian. (Read it for yourself at Acts 8:39-40. I didn’t write about that part of the story). But what if…?

What if Philip had a horse of his own? What if Peter, Paul, Silas, Barnabus, Timothy, and all the other missionaries  of the 1st century had vehicles, or modes of transportation appropriate to their terrain, to help them travel along the way? To help them Speed the Light? Imagine how many more people could have been reached if days, weeks or even months had not been needed to travel from place to place. Imagine how far and wide the Word could have spread with appropriate transportation.

And that is the whole point behind the Speed the Light program. It’s a program that teaches and encourages students, 6th through 12th grade, to be missions minded. The money raised by students and donated to Speed the Light pays for vehicles for missionaries in the U.S. and around the world.

Above I used the words, “appropriate transportation.” That’s because not everyone needs a car. When I was in Tanzania we visited many fishing villages along the shores of Lake Tanganyika. We never would have gotten there if Joy in the Harvest, the mission we worked with, had not had a boat. These villages could only be reached by boat. There were no roads. And so, there are some places that can only be reached by plane, and others by dirt bike, or even bicycle. There are places where the “road” is not more than a path through terrain that we who live in the concrete jungle would never understand.

So if you see a student fundraising, and they say it’s for Speed the Light, think about Philip trying to Catch the Chariot, think of the villages of Tanzania that were visited by the boat from Joy in the Harvest, think of all the missional possibilities and help out.

Catch the Chariot

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Ok, here it is, finally, my second story submitted to the Faith Writers weekly contest. This one scored a “Highly Commended.” It’s been strange, working at my writing. I don’t think I’ve ever made so many changes to anything I’ve written. I am beginning to look at it as a craft. I look forward to crafting more for you all in the future. Enjoy!

The room was full, the buzz, incredible, the excitement, palpable. Peter and John moved from one to another, quickly praying, laying on hands, then rejoicing as another believer poured forth his love for the Son with expressions understood only by God. It was as it had been for them on the day of Pentecost when Holy Spirit first came, praise, worship, pure love spilling from their mouths in a Heavenly language.

Philip watched from the wall. He arrived at this place from Jerusalem in fear, fear for his life, for being a follower of the Way, fear of the people here because of the stories he’d heard. These were the dreaded Samaritans, those who had allowed themselves to be corrupted, those whose worship was no longer True. But arriving here, running for his life from the persecution, he found them to be kind, loving, and real, different from those who followed the Sanhedrin, the ones who killed Jesus, Stephen, and so many others. Solace was found with the ones he had been taught to fear, and fear came from those who were meant to give solace.

He watched with joy as more Samaritans were filled with Holy Spirit, pouring out adoration to God in their new language of love. Suddenly a voice said, “Leave this place and go to a land that I will show you.” He shook his head, digging a finger in his ear, thinking there must have been a fly buzzing. Again the voice said, “Leave this place. Go to a land that I will show you.” There must be a mistake. Those were words spoken to Abraham, father of a great nation. But the voice came again, softer, gentler, yet compelling, “Just start walking, My friend. I will show you the way to go.”

Philip picked up his pack, walked to Peter in the middle of the room, saying, “Hey, Pete, I gotta go. I’m not sure what it is, but I’ve got something I have to do.”

Peter, still in the throes of excitement for the Samaritans receiving Holy Spirit, gave a wave of dismissal, “Yeah, sure. See ya later.”

Philip walked out the door into brilliant sunlight, the voice saying, “Go south to the road, the desert road, that goes down from Jerusalem to Gaza.” And so he did. He walked the dry, dusty path that served as a road, twisting and turning through the desert, sun beating down, the breeze gently wafting all traces of moisture from his skin. In the distance, dust arose from the wheels of a chariot, also headed south. The voice buzzed in Philip’s ear, “Go over and join this chariot.”

“You want me to WHAT? How am I supposed to catch up with a chariot that far ahead of me? Do you have any idea how fast a horse runs?”

“Just do it. Trust.”

So he ran. In spite of the heat, in spite of the condition of the rutted path, in spite of everything, he ran. A trail shot off to his right. His ear buzzed, “This is the way. Run in it.” Veering off the path, the trail dipped into a long-dried river bed, and rose again, depositing Philip just yards behind the chariot.

Philip could see the occupant, seated, reading from a scroll. As he approached, he heard the words, “Like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth.”

“Hey,” called Philip, “I said HEY. Slow up a bit, would ya? Do you have any idea what you’re reading?”

The large, dark skinned man in the chariot signaled to his driver to stop. Philip, panting, hands on knees, catching his breath, twisted his head up, looking at the man, obviously Ethiopian. The man scanned Philip for a moment, taking in the dust covered tunic, the dirt streaked face, and the feet, the beautiful feet of this man who seemed to appear out of nowhere, running and actually catching his horse drawn chariot. “How can I understand if no one explains it?” was his reply, “Come, join me on the journey. We will talk.”

And so it was that Philip led the Ethiopian to Jesus and the salvation He provides. What came after that is a tale for another day, but suffice it to say, the continent of Africa would never be the same again. The director of accounting for the great Queen Candace of Ethiopia saw to that.

Got the results

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I got the results of the first writing contest I ever entered. I finished 3rd out of 19 entries in the beginner level. Not bad. Already working on my next entry. Looking to improve. I’m trying something different on this one. I’ll let you see it when it’s ready.

By the way, I set a goal for this month to get at least one view everyday. I have none yet today, that’s why I’m putting this out there without much substance. Just sayin’.

I Wrote Something

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I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that I needed to start writing more than just babbling complaints in my journal. Well, in an effort to find some prompts to help me do that, I found a Christian writers’ site, several actually. But one in particular has drawn my attention. They hold a weekly writing challenge. I entered. I’ve been trying to wait until I know how I did before posting my entry, but I just can’t wait anymore. Besides, I’ve realized that it doesn’t matter how I do, that can be fodder for another post here. If I’m “short” of writing material, I should be seeking ways to create more.

The challenge puts out a topic each week. Once it hits, entries are accepted for one week. You must write new material, no using something you’ve already written. Length must be between 150 and 750 words. Those are the only criteria for entry. The first topic I wrote for is “I surrender all, (don’t write about the song).” So, here it is. My first ever official writing challenge entry. Hope you enjoy.

What Would You Do For Me?

“I surrender all.” I’ve said it dozens of times. Dozens upon dozens. Maybe even hundreds now. Each time there’s a call to the altar, I say it again. “I surrender all, LORD. I give it all to You. I’ll go anywhere You want. I’ll do anything You want. Just tell me.”

Yes, I’ll do whatever You want, LORD. Just don’t make me work with kids. I don’t like kids. They’re so . . . young and immature. Mission trip to Paraguay?!? Sure, I’ll go. I’ve never been out of the U.S., I don’t speak Spanish, I’ve not even been Christian for a year. Yeah, that’s way out of my comfort zone, but I’ll do it for You, God, as long as there are no children involved. By the way, what will we be doing?

Uh, what!!?? Vacation Bible School!? Isn’t that…? I love You and Your sense of humor. Let’s do this thing!!

Yes, I’ll do whatever You want, LORD. Just don’t make me work with kids. I don’t like kids. They’re so . . . young and rowdy. Mission trip to Haiti?!? Sure, I’ll go. I don’t know Creole and I’ve heard it’s a scary place full of voodoo and walking dead. It’s out of my comfort zone, but I’ll do it for You, God, as long as there are no children involved. By the way, what will we be doing?

Uh, what!!?? Helping out at any all girls orphanage, a children’s hospital and another orphanage for profoundly handicapped children? Say WHAT!??! Your sense of humor is out of this world, LORD. But I was blessed in Paraguay, so, let’s do this thing!

Yes, I’ll do whatever You want, LORD. Just don’t make me work with kids. I don’t like kids. They’re so . . . young and boisterous. Mission trip to Tanzania?! Sure, I’ll go. Isn’t that in Africa, the dark continent? I’ve never been half way around the world, I don’t speak Swahili, and I’m terrified of creepy, crawly, scary things. It’s out of my comfort zone, but I’ll do it for You, God, as long as there are no children involved. By the way, what will we be doing?

A feeding station for nearly 400 street children? Really? Anything else, like maybe something withOUT children? Yeah, like that, a destitute camp for adults. That’s much more up my alley. I can do that. But why is it that they are destitute? Oh, it’s really a leper colony, but it’s politically incorrect to call it that. That’s way outside my comfort zone. I am continually amazed at Your sense of humor, LORD. Let’s do this thing.

You’ve called me to work with the youth group at my church. You’ve called me to start a Bible study for teenagers. You’ve called me, a young in the LORD, white female, to teach pastors in India. You’ve called me to a medical mission in the war zone of Ukraine. Each time You call, I tell You, “I surrender all to You.” I’ve offered up my time, my money, my peace of mind, my safety, left my home, my family, my friends. I was even willing to give up my life if that became necessary. What more is there?

“Will you give up your dog for Me?”

What? Really write Something?

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Imagine my surprise recently, when I got the distinct impression that I’m supposed to start actually writing, not just whining and complaining in my journal time. And when I tried to respond to that impression, I came up with — NOTHING!! I had no cohesive thoughts, ideas, inklings, just nothing!

Hmmmmm. What to do? “Well,” I thought to myself, “there must be some sort of help online.” So I searched writing prompts and found that there is quite a bit of help out there. It remains to be seen if it’s good help or not. It’ll take a while to weed through all the possibilities that appeared online. I also found a couple of creative writing groups that I’m going to investigate for helps. Not just prompts, but encouragement, critiquing, and more. But one of the best prompts actually came from an Instagram caption from my grand niece. She said, “I go to seek a great perhaps.” What a great line! And the story lines that could come from it, well, the possibilities are just endless. And in view of that,…

“I go to seek a great perhaps.”

In His Presence

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So, 2 weeks ago I put it out here that I was going to be more consistent with my writing. And last week I did do my 2 hours of writing on Monday evening, I just didn’t do anything worth posting. But this Monday I wrote nothing. I thought about it, but I just couldn’t do it. I was busy.

Okay, back story. The weekend after I last posted, I went to a women’s conference. At least it was supposed to be a women’s conference. But God has had other plans, for the conference and events since its completion. And actually, completion isn’t exactly the right word. While the conference itself has concluded, the meetings continue. In fact, the meetings have continued every single day. The LORD is inviting us into His Presence. It’s an invitation to all who want to spend time with Him. So I’ve been going to the meetings. I’m going as much as I can, for as long as I can. And for that reason, I spent my writing time in His Presence, just being with Him.

So, last night, (Wednesday the 29th), I went, once again to His Presence. It was an amazingly peaceful time, warm and relaxing. It had been a very long, busy day at work, but in His Presence it all melted away. Incredible testimony was given, focusing on a certain Scripture. Then another speaker spoke on the same Scripture. And finally, Bonnie Chavda spoke, saying that Father had given her that same Scripture as well. Don’t ya just love it when Papa God confirms things by the word of two or three witnesses?

And what, you ask, is this Scripture that was so apropos? “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30.

And so we rested with Papa God, and I relaxed, and received the rest my soul so desperately needed. And I was not the only one who received what was needed. It was evident by the feel throughout the room that others also received. I love the kind of “carnage” the LORD brings in His presence, that of bodies resting all over the room. I love being a part of that carnage. And I am going to make an effort to participate in that type of carnage more often. And you can too. All you need to do is lay down and talk to Him. For some it’s easier with some gentle music. Some want silence. Just find your own place of peace with Him and He will give you rest, and He will talk to you, and you will learn from Him, and grow in relationship. And as you meet with Him and go deeper, He will go deeper with you. It only gets better.

Different cost of Discipleship

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Yes, it’s true, I’ve been gone for quite some time. again. And this may also be short lived, but I need to do it once again. And this may be the time that everything clicks and it turns into lifestyle.

I’ve been watching teachings by Brother Keith Moore from Faith Life Church in Branson, Missouri. One of them, about being a disciple of Christ, spoke of the cost of being a disciple. He likened it to training for the Olympics or military training. It’s an awful lot of hard, strenuous work. It’s staying faithful EVERY day, not just once in a while. It’s focusing on Jesus every day, day after day, from now on.

Until now, as involved as I’ve been, as much as I’ve done, the trips I’ve been on, the training and classes I’ve done, have been as if I was playing a game of disciple. Well, I’m done playing. From this point, I’m going into strenuous training. I will commit myself to a training schedule. I will do my readings. I will concentrate on my classes. I will do my writing each week. These writings may or may not yield something fit to be posted, but I will do the writing.

I’ve been back and forth on this writing thing. I’m going to do it, I might do it, I’m going to try to do it, … Well, now, I’m going to do it. Am I up to such a challenge? I do believe I am. I have a new focus. I’m learning more about my LORD, and I’m learning more about myself. I’m here for a purpose, and I’m here to do ALL of it, not just part of it. And if I’m going to do ALL of it, I need to step up my game and that requires discipline and training.

So here I go. Stepping up to God’s will for me in all areas of my life. Hang on, it’s going to be a wild ride.

St. Baldricks – What the WHAT??

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I wrote this on Sunday March 8th.

Just sitting here on the couch, getting ready to go to bed. I was running my fingers through my hair, and it suddenly struck me, next week at this time, I won’t be able to do that. Then I started thinking about what I’m doing – really – what I’m REALLY doing, and the implications.

Why am I doing this? Is it really for Chase? Is it for a free haircut? Is it to get attention? Is it because I believe in this cause?

When I really think about it, I think it’s probably a little bit of all the above. And when I really, REALLY think about it, I think, “What are you doing!!??” My goodness. I’m going to let some stranger cut ALL of my hair off. All of it. What made me sign up for this?

Then I think of the blog entries I’ve read about Chase. I think about the things he’s gone through, the needles, the surgeries, the chemo, the radiation, the days of isolation, the nights of loneliness and fear. I think of the strength he’s shown. This little boy, just five years old, offering comfort to others as he awaits his fate. I think of his parents, living through the nightmare of the very real possibility of losing their son. I think of his siblings, and how the distance of hospital stays has brought them closer.

And then I think, how can I not do this? How can I chicken out? What’s a little hair. Hair grows back. I’ve heard others say they would do it, but they are afraid their hair would grow back gray. Who cares? In the overall scheme of things, who really cares? What’s a little bit of hair when the cause is children’s lives?

Looking forward to 12:50 pm on Sunday, March 15th at Ballydoyal on New York Street in Aurora!!

If you want to donate, go to https://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/750496/2015
Thanks.